For Those Who Work With Teenagers ~ After The Election

November 13, 2024 – The results of the 2024 presidential election, despite the majority vote, have left roughly many in the country reeling and, for many, traumatized. The work has been hard this week for therapists. For some, the election again of a self-confessed sexual abuser triggers intense posttraumatic stress symptoms. For others, the fear of campaign promises becoming reality shake the very foundations of their lives and survival. The young people I work with weep as they consider the implications for themselves but even more so for their peers.

Every person in my practice will be directly and negatively affected by this election, given the highly diverse nature of my caseload. I imagine that if you are in the human resources industry and are an adolescent service provider you, too, work with those who are struggling. Working with my parts and coming back home to myself again and again (accessing Self energy, in IFS terms) have been the saving grace for me this last week. I offer words below to hold on to and to share. Come back to them when you need them, during life’s challenging and uncertain times.

A measure of wisdom

Dark days, indeed, my friends. I have had several folks reach out this morning, asking for some measure of wisdom, words of hope. Here is what has come to me.

There is Fear. Do not let Fear take you down the spiral of the unimaginable. Be with your Fear, wrap your strong arms around it. Look into its eyes, And then bring courage, The brave spirit of the heart. Let Fear know that in the Darkness there is always Light.

There is Despair. While we want to bring Hope into those spaces brought down by hopelessness, do not bring hope. Come to Despair with an open heart. Make space for the tears, the grief, the deep sadness for all that is lost, will be lost, and may be lost. Do not dismiss your despair with Hope. Ask Despair to help you move with and through the grief. This is the way we find our way back home to ourselves.

There is Anger. We need this loyal soldier! Anger is the fire we gather around and warm our hands by. But we must not feed the fire so that it becomes an inferno. We feed the fire with radical Compassion. Those who have turned towards and invited into the darkness are also victims. They too are lost. They need our Anger and our Compassion.

There is Hate. It too has a place with us. Where there is Fear often there is Hate. There cannot be Love without Hate. Love without Hate is a shadow of itself. Hate gives our Love depth, a reason, a map of the way forward. It does not have to be our friend nor is it an ally. It is a companion. Do not pretend that it is not there, because it will get the better of you otherwise. Acknowledge your Hate, take its hand, and say, “Come with me and see what Love can do.”

Three of the wisest words I know are “I don’t know.” Stay firmly planted right where you’re at. Do not go drifting off into the future. Do not claw your way back to the past and hold on for dear life. Stay here. Now. Go to the mirror and meet your eyes there. Look into those windows of your soul. Bring yourself back home to yourself. And from there, take the next step and the next one, and the next one.

Things fall apart. Dionysus, the god of ecstasy and dissolution, is present here with us. We see his handiwork today. We are perched on this bright blue ball spinning in the cosmos living unsustainable lives. Things have to fall apart. We must do everything we can to help those who suffer and are in danger. And we have to lean into the cracks, the crevices, into the wounds. Because there are wounds everywhere.

Reach for perspective. The people who are seemingly in power are just people. They are wounded people and want so desperately to control at the expense of people’s lives. They are just people. Remember, you too have power. You too have choice. You too have a voice. You too have agency. Take it! Use it! Be intentional with your words. Reach for Radical Compassion and Humility.

And every day, every minute, every breath, feel your feet, touching the Earth and know that through those few square inches on the soles of your feet, you are intimately connected with every single being on this planet. We belong to each other. We are just humans, another animal walking on the planet. Part of the warp and weft and weave of life and the cosmos. We are small and insignificant and we are mighty and powerful.

Find your place here. And take the next step.



Photo by: ABCDstock